Amy Schumer

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Last quote by Amy Schumer

I met him about ten years ago. I was co-hosting this music show on the Fuse network with Mark Hoppus from Blink-182. Steve was on with his bluegrass band the Steep Canyon Rangers. Just so you know, that was the first time I got it. I wasn't just going up to tell him about any old period.feedback
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Oct 17 2017
In this page, you will find a list of 55 quotes from Amy Schumer, from different articles. We analyzed 32 articles in which Amy Schumer has been quoted in topics like Beyonc? and video. Amy Schumer’s most recent quote is: “I want to be [as] hopeful in love and commitment as possible. I can't lie about it. I don't have this blind optimism.”. To see more examples Amy Schumer’s views and opinions, check out the section below.
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Amy Schumer quotes

May 16 2017

We are talking about today. I love the idea of committing to someone and making that choice and I want to have a family but right now, we are not in talks. It's good to have a lot of space. We smiled at each other and in that moment, everything felt right. I want to be [as] hopeful in love and commitment as possible. I can't lie about it. I don't have this blind optimism.feedback

May 16 2017

A year ago today I met the love of my life. Happy anniversary f– face. #Iwantoseeotherpeople.feedback

May 12 2017

I feel sexy when I'm dirty. I like the dirt and the sweat. And it is good for contour. Dirt!feedback

May 11 2017

People love Goldie, but the two of us really wanted to make it together and we showed them what we could do and read scenes together and it was very clear and everybody was on board very quick.feedback

May 11 2017

So Kurt opens the door, and it's the most beautiful place I've ever seen. He says, Amy, it is so meaningful to meet you. I love Goldie so much and you're so important to her,' . I'm looking at him just thinking, We sat next to each other through the whole Golden Globes. Umm…' I mean, just the warmest greeting! And again, today I posted a video of us all over drinking and dancing – and what did he ask you?feedback

May 10 2017

Ahhhhh i love you!!!feedback

May 04 2017

I know who's here. It's like taking a warm bath in a tub full of dick that doesn't want you.feedback

May 03 2017

Are people with money not doing stuff like this? I think they should do more, because you'll feel better. And then they'll do that for someone else, you hope.feedback

May 03 2017

It's because it does make me feel great and I feel like I have no other choice.feedback

May 03 2017

I feel fine about having money. I take care of my family, my friends. I think I might feel guilty about having money if I wasn't giving.feedback

May 03 2017

For me, when I was living in a studio in Astoria, if somebody left me $1,000, that would change my month.feedback

May 03 2017

I may have threatened you to touch it. I know! What's that about? I had to go home and black out on my own. I was psyched cause it was my favorite and it was free. I got photographed in it, [then] I was doing an event to promote my book and these picketers came in real yell-y. And they're like, Canada Goose is murdered!' To make the hoods they kill coyotes. I was like, If I made a list of the animals I care about more than coyotes, it would be a list of every animal.' I don't care. You can't make somebody care about coyotes if they don't!feedback

May 03 2017

In every interview I've been doing to promote Snatched the journalists will be like, So your body, what's the plan? I'm like, Look, I am in a bathing suit in this movie. There's nudity. I feel good about my body.' I think other people need to work on how they feel. I'm good. But they talk to me like I need to be buttered to fit through a door.feedback

May 03 2017

You have to want to stay together is what she always says. It's like two people have to want to be in it. You can't work on that, either you want to be together or you don't.feedback

May 02 2017

In terms of my dad being sick, it was just confusing to me, especially the way MS works. He was in physical pain. That's when I kind of took the lead and took care of everybody in my family. I would keep them – I would keep everybody laughing.feedback

May 02 2017

Some days he's really good and he's with it and we're joking around. And some days I go to visit my dad and it's so painful. I can't believe it.feedback

May 02 2017

I've worked very hard to not be a mom. But I'm 35, I'm sick of thinking of myself, you know? It's just like enough Amy, who cares?feedback

May 02 2017

No, are you serious? No, the most annoying question I get is always about … like, so you're in a bathing suit in this movie ….feedback

May 02 2017 - Women

It's people doing an impression of having a conversation … I don't like the farce. We're dressed up like a bunch of f–king a–holes.feedback

May 01 2017

I left [Hawn] alone during the flight. We'd never met. I waited till we got off the plane and then I went up and I harassed her. And I was just like, I really want you to play my mom in this movie. And she was just like, Okay, honey.feedback

Apr 25 2017

Of course. Is she the most beautiful person in the world?feedback

Apr 06 2017

I put like 160 [SPF] on my face.feedback

Apr 05 2017

What's good about not being a model is that it's not the thing I trade on. Once I start looking older, that won't affect me. I have never gotten anything done because I'm, like, so gorgeous. I'm good-looking enough that I can work in the business. I get enough attention from men that I feel good. I see pictures of myself now, and I look younger than I think of myself. It hasn't scared me yet.feedback

Apr 05 2017

I think frustration is good. I just want to make people laugh, but I'm also in a place where I want to make change. A joke doesn't have to be something that's going to make people think, but if it can, that's better.feedback

Mar 24 2017 - Sex

He's very protective of me. Like, not overprotective, but if someone's taking pictures of me or filming in a restaurant, he'll start taking pictures of them. He's really cool. It's not a problem to be around any of the sorts of people who are at these events. He takes it all in his stride. But when I say, Shall we get out of here?' he's like, Yes!' I'm so lucky that I met him. Things were just really easy with him. There were no games, no waiting three days. It was clear and easy. He was so sweet. He didn't know who I was. He'd heard my name.feedback

Mar 24 2017

Sadly, I'm no longer able to commit to Barbie due to scheduling conflicts. The film has so much promise, and Sony and Mattel have been great partners. I'm bummed, but look forward to seeing Barbie on the big screen.feedback

Mar 16 2017 - Netflix

I am only alarmed by the people printing their organized trolling as 'news,' . This is what the current administration wants. So journalists – do better, it's embarrassing. Trolls, see you on the next one!feedback

Mar 16 2017 - Populism

I want to thank them. It makes me feel so powerful and dangerous and brave. It reminds me what I'm saying is effective and bring more interest to my work and their obsession with me keeps me going.feedback

Mar 06 2017 - Thanksgiving

I look very stupid skinny. My dumb head stays the same size but then my body, like, shrivels and just look like a, like a Thanksgiving Day parade [balloon] of Tonya Harding. Nobody likes it. It's not cute on me. I got worried because it gets in your head – just everything on television and movies and magazines and the internet. All the women are just beautiful little skeletons with tits … I'm like, Oh, my god! Are men still going to be attracted to me?' And that's when I remembered…they don't care. I feel very good in my own skin. I feel strong. I feel healthy. I do. I feel sexy.feedback

Nov 10 2016 - Trump Presidency

My act will change because I will need to learn to speak Spanish because I will move to Spain or somewhere. It's beyond my comprehension if Trump won. It's too crazy.feedback

Oct 28 2016

I did not mean to detract any of the meaning from the video. I am of course horrified and sickened by the events that are addressed throughout that video and didn't see this as minimizing that and still don't. It was a way to celebrate bringing us all together.feedback

Oct 28 2016

It was NEVER a parody. It was just us women celebrating each other. The video Beyonce made was so moving and I wouldn't ever make fun of that.feedback

Jun 15 2015

A lot of the insecurities and defense mechanisms are very much me.feedback

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