David Letterman


Last quote by David Letterman

Two or three days later, I realize things have gone terribly wrong. The thing I like about this, [Stern] seems to be nervous about this, and anytime you can get Howard nervous I think you've accomplished something. I am a bit of a different person. And I mean, thank God. Because the great struggle in life is to be better each and every day, and if you take a look around the horizon of humanity, my god, is there anything we can do big or small to make the life of just one person a little bit better, and that's no small accomplishment.feedback
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Oct 18 2017
Find all of David Letterman’s quotes that have been published in 34 different articles on this page. David Letterman’s quotes are organized by date and topic, making it easy for you to compare, for example, what David Letterman has said both recently, and in the past, on a variety of topics. Some of the topics David Letterman likes to comment on include St. Ignatius, Bill Murray and gift. Most recently, David Letterman said, “It was a joke: Take a dump on the stage, load him up, send him back. Conan will not shut up about the horse. The horse has gone crazy. Maybe it's from being around Conan all day… So now he's complaining, and there may be litigation, and maybe I'll get a call from PETA. And [the horse] apparently broke into Conan's mansion.”.
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David Letterman quotes

Jun 03 2017

I think it's true of films made in the U.K. during the war years to be more emotionally tangible, more emotionally grounded. The experience was right there.feedback

May 30 2017 - Trump administration

I have begun to lose confidence in the Trump administration.feedback

May 16 2017

He didn't save the show, but he saved me.feedback

May 16 2017

This is an exciting honor. For 33 years, there was no better guest, no greater friend of the show, than Mark Twain. The guy could really tell a story.feedback

Apr 20 2017

In my mind, I think of you as a goon. All I knew about him was that his ideology seemed counter to mine. My premise with him was that 'You're too smart to believe the things you're saying. Aren't you just playing the part of the right-wing buffoon?' For a long time, I used to think that was true. I always liked having folks on that were not the mainstream.feedback

Apr 11 2017

I decided that I didn't like Warren Littlefield because I didn't get The Tonight Show. I blamed the whole thing on him. Rather than accept responsibility myself, I decided 'I'll blame somebody else…' At the time I was up to my nose in 'God dammit!feedback

Apr 11 2017

Once Jay left, I knew I had to get out. I was already the old guy.feedback

Apr 11 2017 - Sex

He will [know about it] one day. We'll have to have a conversation about it. But not yet.feedback

Apr 11 2017 - Sex

I'm in hell. I will always be in hell until the day after, when I will go to hell.feedback

Apr 11 2017 - Sex

I was looking for a refuge,' . 'Whether they knew it or not, [my staffers] were being used to support me. I didn't want to go outside. Outside I was scared. Scared as I've ever been in my life. The show was endlessly helpful.feedback

Apr 11 2017 - Sex

It was akin to having killed your family in a car crash. It was like that to me,' . 'I was afraid my family was gone.feedback

Apr 08 2017

The poor guy just can't stay up this late. It was either that or he swallowed a harmonica.feedback

Apr 08 2017

When I came here for rehearsals, I was reminded what a gift live music is, . Never take live music for granted.feedback

Apr 08 2017 - Human Rights

These guys in Pearl Jam were something more than a band. They're true living cultural organisms. They would recognize injustice and they would stand up for it. Whether it was human rights or the environment. Whether it was poverty. They didn't let it wash over them. They would stand up and react.feedback

Apr 08 2017

Every time they were there, they would blow the roof off the place. For two years I did a show without a roof on the damn theater.feedback

Apr 06 2017

Don coming on our show was always a highlight for me. Just endless mischief and nonsense, and a guy who would make the audience go completely crazy. Such a professional, such a gentleman. I already miss him.feedback

Apr 06 2017

I'd like him to know what I did. The question is: Will he give a crap? I need to be prepared that he won't and accept that.feedback

Apr 05 2017

I'm afraid if I still had a show, it would be a lot of, We're spending quite a lot of money on editing, Dave. If you could just keep it to an hour, we'd all appreciate that, because we have big stars who've flown in from Hollywood to be here.feedback

Mar 17 2017

For years and years and years – 30, 40 years – I was anxious, and hypochondriacal, and an alcoholic, and many, many other things that made me different from other people.feedback

Mar 08 2017

He was so much better at his job than I was at my job. If something was going crazy, all I had to do was look behind the guest's head at Paul, and I could see that Paul sensed the same problem that I sensed. We would know, yeah, the engine has broken.feedback

Mar 07 2017

Boy, how about the time that we had the donkey that came out and the jockey threw up? Some nights the show would be okay; some nights the show would not be okay. But the one thing you can't assail is what my wife was shrewd enough to point out ... I was able to give jobs to people. That's an accomplishment.feedback

Mar 06 2017

He was a joke of a wealthy guy. We didn't take him seriously. He'd sit down, and I would just start making fun of him. I don't want to criticize Jimmy Fallon, but I can only tell you what I would have done in that situation: I would have gone to work on Trump.feedback

Mar 06 2017

Alec Baldwin deserves a Presidential Medal of Freedom. Sadly, he's not going to get it from this president. Well, that's Alec Baldwin and Saturday Night Live. It's distracting the batter. Eventually Trump's going to take a fastball off the sternum and have to leave the game. People tell me nice things about Seth Meyers, that he's good and thoughtful. I'm aware that Stephen has been able to solidify his position [in the wake of Trump], or – having not seen the show, I don't know what the situation was prior. I can't say much about these shows, because I just don't watch them.feedback

Mar 06 2017

I always regarded him as, if you're going to have New York City, you gotta have a Donald Trump. He was a joke of a wealthy guy. We didn't take him seriously. He'd sit down, and I would just start making fun of him. He never had any retort. He was big and doughy, and you could beat him up. He seemed to have a good time, and the audience loved it, and that was Donald Trump.feedback

Mar 06 2017

I think I would be in the position to give him a bit of a scolding and he would have to sit there and take it. Yeah, I would like an hour with Donald Trump; an hour and a half.feedback

Mar 06 2017

He made it so that not doing political stuff got to be the elephant in the room. I don't want to criticize Jimmy Fallon, but I can only tell you what I would have done in that situation: I would have gone to work on Trump. I would just start with a list. You did this. You did that. Don't you feel stupid for having done that, Don? And who's this goon Steve Bannon, and why do you want a white supremacist as one of your advisers? Come on, Don, we both know you're lying. Now, stop it.feedback

Mar 06 2017

I think I would be in the position to give him a bit of a scolding and he would have to sit there and take it.feedback

Oct 23 2016

That Saturday, my son, in Bill Murray's christening gown, was christened at St. Ignatius in Manhattan, and we have this memory, we have this gift, we have this gesture for the rest of our lives.feedback

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